Showing posts with label my true feelings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label my true feelings. Show all posts

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

AND THEN THE BLOGGER RESTED



After almost a week of massive, as Gail would best describe, update of this blog, the blogger rested on Sunday night-just in time to watch "Eat Bulaga" or have a massage there!!!! In going back and choosing the copies and photos to post, I came to realize what a long and satisfying feeling that I had in the last two months. For one, I get to know Mabelle, Billy and Julius more. And what a fine son Julius is becoming and what fine family they are. I can only see a better and happy future for them. Or I can see a daughter down the line! Joke only. Second, I get closer to Da Kuya thru after daily small talks. And why is this? Maybe it's because we have grown up, mature and finally ready to hang our gloves ( for that matter, our egos). So much as Da Kuy is asking me already how and where we would retire, which is not too far away. I hope I won't be too far away from my him, Lynn and Mabelle. We'll need each others support.

The trip gave me a chance to be with Daddy again for which I've been thinking of doing for a long time. That's why till now it makes me tear up when I see him, in my mind, playing catch with the beach ball in Tarawoods. His smile reminds of our happy days here. His happiness is simple--to be with his family. But now he is alone with Mommy. But, Daddy, it wouldn't be long we'll see you again. I'll prove you wrong. The trip also gave me some time to share with Mommy. Especially when It came to karaokeing. She still has the voice. Although, she can't seem to forget that I forgot some items I promise to bring for her. Some time to treasure although Mommy can sometimes be to domineering. She has to be in control even if we have our own lives now. She just have to realize that it's alright to give way to other thinking.

Lastly, our last trip, I was able to know more Gwen and John, Gail and Alej. But, I know it's not enough to fully appreciate them. But, I truly thank for all their help. The only persons I didn't get to know more are Lynn and Jon--and why not, I'm always chatting with Lynn almost every week. And Jon, I know even his whole life story by reading his blog. I only wish I could have spent time with my other relatives and find out what happened to some of my friends and loves.

Those were the best of times, those were times I wish would never end and those were the times I'll never forget. And later, after all these years I wish we could stay in touch (friends and family). For we had good times and nothing will erase those in my memory.

Thursday, January 10, 2008

NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS

It's already the tenth day of the year and 355 days to go till 2009. This Rat Year's started very fast. All I can remember's waiting for the countdown on the Eve, then the NY party went back to work the next three days, then it was a weekend again and by tomorrow it will be Friday again. All along I forgot to make any New Year's resolutions which I do every year, but, tend to break them a month after. So much for change even there are nothing bad to change in me. Yabang ano? I have been good
last year. Actually, there's one resolution I want to make and that is to remember to greet you guys on your special or not so special events. Know that I try and know too that you are always on my mind. Oh, and another resolution: to go to confession, even once a year, preferably during Lenten season. So that every Communion I take on Sundays will really be meaningful.

But, I don't have to wait for Lent, I will confess that I, Nette and Gino for that matter, didn't go and hear Mass on Christmas Eve, or Christmas Day or New Year's, which is actually Mama Mary's birthday, too. And that never happened to me before. And I feel awful about it. The cold weather, the preparation for our party and the drive to Astrid's house were not the excuses. There was no excuse but plain laziness. I can't forgive myself for it, but, I guess the Monsignior (aka Daddy) will. Too late now and I always think about it. How could I? If only I could have been stronger in my religious practice. If only I could make up for them. All of these comes to regrets. And that will be the topic of my next post.

I don't want to spoil your New Year with my rantng. I only want to let it out my chest. I only want to be loved--drama ano? To be understood, so much as to understand others. On my 10 days of my life this year, I want to feel better at mysef. Because if I don't, I would be a fake--which I'm certainly not one. What you see in me is who I am. Not plastic. Maybe boring, but what you get from me is sincerity. It will still be a good year for all of us, especially Gwen and John and Kuya's family. Do you agree?

Saturday, November 3, 2007

Baby What A Big Surprise

After a stressful last weeks of October caused by the fires in paradise and the first two commemorative days of November. Now comes in sight the view of a much greener pasture,a much enjoyful life, a much better life for one of our own. The breaking great news was revealed to us yesterday evening that for a while we didn't believe what we were seeing. And after showing us more proofs that everything was for real, we knew that it was the truth. And who could be more happier than my kid brother and me (and later I'm sure, my whole family here and abroad). So, without further ado, stand up Mabelle and family, accept our greetings of congratulations for an accomplishment that you should have deserved a long time ago. You really did a great job on this one. I assure you that it is so, because unlike me, you did it without asking so much help from anybody. It may have taken for both of us to finally get this, I say it was worth the wait. And we can proudly say that we stayed true to ourselves and the respect that comes with it. I can even say that I felt more (a little bit) happier with this than when we got ours. I can only imagine what you are feeling now and the coming weeks. I say this should put a big smile everytime on your face for a long time.

I know from experience that this is only the start and a lot has to be done. And this thing is NOT the only way to make us to be really happy, but, it's definitely a big help. Don't you agree? But,I'm sure you know that also by now. We all learn from our mistakes, correct them and stand up stronger after we fall. Let the past be our guide to a better future. Good things happen to good people and who ask for help from God. Even if we fail sometimes, we will receive what His mercy will give us and return stay true to his teachings. Am I sounding too corny already? I can't help it I have to put down my reading glasses which is starting blur out with tears. Tears of joy and relief for who better feel and understand than me who saw you grow from an innocent girl to a more mature mother and wife. I may not have been there for you when you needed me. But now, I'm just a TXT away, so to say. I will always remember this important day, too.

Now it's time to drive into new and greener pastures, time to see the world and time to hug and meet (again) those people that really matters to you. Without fear and without shame. Holding your head high and be proud again. Holding again those warm hands of our parents that have all our lives all meanth unconditional love and unending comfort while there is time. For I've seen too many 80th birthdays and I envy those people in those ocassions. Don't worry we will celebrate one in the near future and we will happily be waiting for it.

I also know that you have many plans or many responsibilities or many worries that come with this achievement, let these take care of itself. (Like what I used to say to myself when we going through the same situation:"Everything will work out well. Everthing will eventually turn out good for us." And it has. And I am grateful for Him. And I'm thankful that everything's still turning good for us. Got to go Mass tomorrow. Mommy always tells you and your family's always in her prayers and now I believe her. Why don't you call her yourself? That would really make them happy. And hear the words:"Baby, that's a big surprise!" A wonderful one at that. I can only add:"It's a wonderful world." Afterall. Love you all!